Saturday, May 15, 2010

I'm back bitches. And I. Bought. Clogs.

Before I get into THAT HAWT MESS....

Hello again my lovely dahlings.

I've been MIA.  Your reader feeds have been absent the sequins and jazz hands my musings provide.  Lament no longer.

I was occupied finishing university.  Fuck you Renowned Institution of Higher Learning.  Now give me my $30,000 (more if you count in books, living expenses etc.) 81/2x11 certificate of Knowing Some Shit.  And it better be on some fancy high grade copy paper too.  For a lot of thousands of dollars I* lined your broke-ass coffers with I want some thick cream paper with a marble design, a fancy wax stamp and some signatures done in real ink.  Also, throw in a frame would you?  And none of that bullshit flimsy Zellers crap.  I want a frame with the Renowned Institution's name on it.  And someone famous and smart to smile and shake my hand while my Dad gets a picture and Mom cries.     

*And by "I" I mean Daddy's money

When I was done playing typewriter monkey and musing on a bunch of crap to get some marks I moved home.  Free rent in a sweet 'hood!  Free food! Lots of shit from parents who think my life is OVER because I have zero intention of going to grad school (even though I have a life plan)!  I did some entrepreneurial action to make my own sweet job.  5min walking commute and flexible hours for the win.  This is to support my shopping habit/paying down the student loan while I wait out the paperwork process for le dream job.

I also acquired some arm candy that makes my heart feel like it has been overtaken by a horde of butterflies (barf).  Like an actual Facebook-certified boyfriend.  It's kind of a long story, so I'll sum it up.  So there was this guy in two of my classes and I paid no attention to him whatsoever except for the few times we ran into each other on the bus because I thought he was kind of...different.  And then through a sequence of events (culminating in a lot of booze) I realized what he already knew about me: OMG I LIKE YOU SO MUCH.  And it's all been rainbows and unicorns and blue skies.  We even discovered we disagree on something (the Queen), which is totally awesome.   

I'll probably write another post in some length of time about how he BORKES MY HEART and cross out all this text as a giant FUCK YOU.  Or maybe I should be less cynical.  Barf, I know.  Most people don't give a shit when other people are happy.  There is so much cruelty and misery and wasting of lives that a little hint of  the beautiful really is so important.    

RIGHT THEN.  I. Bought. Clogs.

Yes, I know dolls.  I said from the second Chanel sent them down the runway at S/S 2010 that they has a massive case of FUG.  And I wined about them over and over.  And then they grew on me.  Now I would cut a bitch for some Chanel clogs (not the dark brown ones though...that color still has a case of the fugs). 

How'd this happen?  As noted in my last post I was having a crisis of the freshness right now.  I feel like I'm both on a precipice and in a no man's land between the old and the new unsure of where to proceed to where my exterior mirrors how I feel inside (which is the entire existential aim of style and fashion).  I've tried out a few directions with little real success.  In times of uncertainty I tend to gravitate towards the classically stylish (trenches, pear studs, detailed flats and a good lipstick) which makes me feel presentable, but my interior is less staid.

Among other things I was evaluating my spring/summer footwear options.  I resurrected my classic black leather flats, chucks and gladiators from last summer (the later COULD be overdone, but my style of them remains au courant).  I bought a pair of light brown leather knee high 5 inch heel boots in February that cross all the seasons, but I can only pull those out when I know I won't be walking far as FIERCE as they are.  I was looking for something lighter and fresher to add to the arsenal.  Of all my options the only ones that said HEAT were the gladiators.  I needed something lighter and more current.  I bought a pair of tan leather flats with a classic leather woven detail for both fun and profit (ie work interviews, which I do a lot of).  The black flats are classic, but were looking a little 'hood (i.e. used up and dirty no matter how much I polished them) and....black.  Black is not a summer shade.  I needed something else.  Something to wear with my plethora of summer dresses and shorts and pants if need be.  Something that is FRESH, but comfortable for the everyday.  I felt no inspiration walking through the isles of the stores in (and out of) my price point.  Woven "tribal" sandals, gladiators and other options abound, but none of it was anything of note.  None of it was an accessory I could don to pull me out of this precarious position in this void of style nothingness.   

BEHOLD:


OK. OK.  So they don't have that often so questionable wooden heel.  I would still call them a clog style (as did the queer salesman @ Browns where I got them).  Have you ever REALLY tried to walk in those Dear Readers?  They don't bend!  My general rule for shoe buying is you have to be able to use them for their intended purpose (walking).  With these I get the fierceness of the fresh stylz sans the questionable heel.  These bitches were SOLD OUT all over TO in the the good color, so I tried them on for size in another colour and ordered them online.  They are set to arrive early next week and it cannot be soon enough!  I never really would have considered the "slide" before, but these are so unique.  I even exercised some patience and waited over a week between spotting them, trying them on in another color and buying them online to see if they're really an object I want in my life on a permanent basis ( for serious I spent less time deciding on which boyfriend I wanted ;).  They get the silhouette of the clog anyone who's relevant will recognize and nod to.  They have a heel that is ever-so-required to walk with more swagga' without making your feet, and by extension disposition, into a giant boo-boo.  All around LOVES.  They don't necessarily look like much, but I was instantly drawn to them and they make me feel like a million bucks in them.  I am so excited to wear these with printed light and short summer dresses and distressed jean short shorts with flowy tops. 

Xo
Erin